two minutes and 15 seconds
what football players and cheerleaders have in common...and don't
Happy Monday! Or should I say, “Super Sick Monday,” when a ton of people call in sick post-Super Bowl festivities. I for one woke up for my 5:30am HIIT class and was NOT HAPPY ABOUT IT. Plus it was abs day. Try holding a plank at 5:30am the morning after the Super Bowl and I promise you will be upset.
For many of us, the Super Bowl is a day to eat an egregious amount of chip dip, judge the ads and hope for a halftime show as good as Beyonce 2013. For me it’s also a reminder that in elite sports, everything can boil down to just minutes of your performance. You can train your whole life but it’s one competition that matters.
A couple weeks ago I finally watched Cheer on Netflix, the documentary about champion cheer team Navarro College. I was kind of avoiding it because I was worried it would make me miss cheerleading.
Spoiler alert: It did make me miss cheer. But it was also oddly therapeutic, because the cheerleaders in the documentary also know their time on the mat is limited. They say it in the doc: You have two minutes and 15 seconds, and then it’s over. You spend your whole life working and practicing, to perform a routine that lasts two minutes and 15 seconds. That’s your chance to compete, and then you realize it’s over and you’ll never perform again, a thing you spent your whole life doing.
Everyone who has competed as a cheerleader knows this, because elite cheer is one sport you can’t do after you leave school. They don’t make cheer or dance competitions for adults unless you become a D-list celebrity and end up on Dancing With the Stars, and the best way to become a D-list celebrity is to go on The Bachelor. And that’s just not an option for me, because I don’t drink enough champagne.
Sure, you can dance on the sidelines for the NFL. But there is nothing like the feeling of hitting a new stunt for the first time or throwing your back handspring in front of the crowd without landing on your face (not always a given for me).
Freshman year of high school: The first time my stunt group hit an arabesque. I was backspotting and my legs have never been so defined.
When I got to college I didn’t cheer, opting instead to experience college as fully as possible and live my life the way I didn’t get to in high school. In other words, I got to tailgate. I got to watch Gossip Girl for the first time all the way through. I got to be involved in Greek life, go to as many 80’s themed frat parties as I wanted, spend spring break in Panama City Beach, and ski off the fun jumps without fear of injury. I had the absolute time of my life.
So there is life after cheer. Just like there is life after football, and life after any other sport you used to play that came to an end.
I don’t regret stopping cheer after high school. But that doesn’t mean I don’t miss it, and I remember what it was like to compete knowing it could be the last time. When I was watching both the Cheer documentary and the Super Bowl, I felt this same sense of finality and loss. As an athlete your days are numbered. But there is one major difference. At least high school football players have a shot at playing professionally. Even if making the NFL is far-fetched for most players, at least there is always that chance. And at least the entire nation supports the sport and gets excited about it. I get excited about Worlds but it’s not exactly a national pastime.
I’m hoping one day that cheerleaders hoping to cheer professionally or even recreationally as an adult have the opportunity to do so, and that they are celebrated for it. What I would give to be in the air again, or be throwing people in the air again, even if just for another two minutes and 15 seconds.
In the meantime, any former cheerleaders in the Denver area want to form a stunt group? I’ll backspot!
On to the news part of the newsletter:
The Most Loved—and Hated—Super Bowl Ads, According to Adweek’s Instagram. (Adweek)
Did you know bubble wrap was originally intended to be wallpaper? Can this still be a thing? 50 Surprising Facts About Bubble Wrap (Mental Floss)
This $50 device is trying to finally kill off the walkie-talkie: Except it still relies on WiFi and cell service. Why can’t we just go back to the normal walkie-talkie? Crazy how WiFi has made smart phones useless, if you really think about it. How many times have you been at a music festival or on a hike or a ski slope and needed a way to communicate that doesn’t depend on AT&T? Let’s all just get old-school walkie-talkies and call it a day. (Fast Company)
People are apparently very confused and think the coronavirus is related to Corona beer. Aside from the fact that this line of thinking is nonsensical, it also shows how fast people will believe something and how fast misinformation can spread. (VICE)
‘Hamilton’ Movie With Original Broadway Cast Coming to Theaters: The movie will be a live capture of the stage performance. I saw it in SF and it 100% lived up to the hype, but I am also so pumped to see the OG cast. (Variety)
Think dueling ended with the Hamilton era? The Dudes Exploiting Legal Loopholes to Settle Disputes — and Divorces — by Swordfight. Yes, for real. (MEL Magazine)
Our Instructions for AI Will Never Be Specific Enough: Coders can’t think of everything. One problem with artificial intelligence might be that we’re not careful enough what we wish for. (Atlantic)
Surprisingly good shows on Netflix:
I’ve been watching more TV lately and I promise it’s a good thing: It means I’m taking more time to let myself relax for once. My two cents:
Cheer: We’ve covered that one. Whether you’ve cheered or not, it’s an incredible watch and you’ll finish the 6-part series in a day. Just wait ‘til Daytona.
Next in Fashion: It’s Project Runway, but hosted by Alexa Chung and Tan France. I randomly threw it on and for some reason Chris didn’t turn it off, and then I didn’t turn it off, and 4 episodes in I was still interested.
The Good Place: It’s hard for me to get into comedies but this one is hilarious, clever and deep.
The Crown: Season 3 is out and it’s still just as compelling with the entirely new cast. Yes, you read that right: They replaced the whole cast, to depict the royal family in later years. And they are killing it, including HBC as Princess Margaret.
Mad Men, for the millionth time
Chris Quote of the Week
“Someone give this man a cheeseburger!”
- Chris, who placed an interesting Super Bowl bet that Chiefs coach Andy Reid would eat a cheeseburger by the end of the broadcast. Spoiler alert: He did not.
Productivity Hack
I’ve been facing a lot of writer’s block lately at work so I downloaded Danger Notes, which is one of the funniest apps I’ve ever seen. You start writing and it times you for five minutes, and you can’t stop writing until the timer is up. And if you stop writing, it DELETES ALL OF YOUR WORK.
Basically it forces you to write. So if you’re one of those people who “works best under pressure,” Danger Notes is the best way to bust it out.
Hop Take: Craft beer pick of the week
A friend brought this to the Super Bowl party that Chris and I hosted and it has been so long since I’ve had 312s, but it was just as good as I remembered. Produced by Goose Island in Chicago, the 312 is named after the area code. It’s the ultimate Chicago beer and reminds me of when the Cubs won the World Series, since 312s were on special for a dollar every game and it was quite a time to be alive.
Thanks for reading this week’s edition! On to a whopping two nights of The Bachelor, because one night of champagne drama clearly isn’t enough.
Cheers,
A